I feel like I am tying up a lot of loose ends at the moment. Getting rid of stuff that’s been hanging over me for months, squaring paperwork away, finally putting art up in the house, and that sort of thing.
Maybe there has been a subconscious reluctance to do that – finish unpacking and really settle in properly to our new place. I suppose it’s not surprising given the events of last year, but I think it’s had a much deeper effect on me than I first thought. I’m definitely less stressed in my personal life now than I was for almost all of last year (sadly, it’s now all transferred to my professional life!). But I was so worried for so long, living life with breath held and shoulders hunched for so many months, that it now feels odd to not be worried. Worried about not being worried – I know how stupid that sounds, but it’s how I feel. Trudging along a muddy path with no end in sight.
I lost so much enthusiasm for everything – going anywhere, talking to anyone, my business – I really lost my mojo last year.
I’m not one for philosophical introspection, but I suppose it feels good to say goodbye to the last year and hello to a new one, where I actually feel like I might be able to, as they say, get back on it.