What were you doing at 2am this morning? I was lying awake thinking that there was a mere 4.5 hours before I had to get up again, having just gotten to bed an hour beforehand. I am tired today. I am no good to man nor beast when I am this tired. But the show must go on as they say.
The reason I am so tired, apart from being busier than Richard Madeley in a Majestic Wine Warehouse in general, is that last nite I had the pleasure of working on the Renfrew Ferry, which for the uninitiated is a floating bar/restaurant/club on the Clyde, Glasgow’s big dirty river. I have done a few shifts there before, but somehow rather rashly I found myself agreeing to a mid-week shift thinking I’d be home by midnite and it would be a quiet stint.
Sadly I was wrong. I arrived to find everyone snickering under their breath at me for some reason and I soon realised why. I was working downstairs, which was fine, but with the guy that everyone loves to hate – let’s call him Luigi (I don’t know why). Luigi is an odious little boy, with crap hair, crapper teeth and just a hint of BO. He is also without doubt the most bare faced compulsive liar I think I’ve ever met (altho there was one girl I used to know that would give him a run for his money) and I had to listen to this guy on a 5 hour monlogue about the most utter nonsense all the while trying not to throw him overboard.
Add to that the fact that it was actually really busy as the evening was a ceilidh for 502 delegates from all over Europe at a sleep research conference and I was done in. Ironic really that they are all experts in sleep but their incessant partying was depriving me of mine! I did ask one of them how I could improve my quality of sleep but it got lost in translation, as did the word for 2 in many cases, bizarrely.
Luigi also claimed that he was psychic and could tell what I was thinking. Funnily enough, he didn’t manage to guess that I was thinking he was an asshole and that I would really like to chop him into tiny pieces and feed him to Steve.
This morning I am like the walking dead. I have been sitting at my desk for 2.5 hours and have faxed prceisely one slice of a4 paper. That’s all I’ve done. Mr Ed said to me approximately 1.5 hours ago when he showed up he’d be with me in 5 minutes. I’ve not seen him since. I had thought on perhaps doing a mini day in life today to illustrate my ineptness when I am sleep starved, but I don’t have the energy for it.
I did go and see my new subtitling colleagues yesterday and they are all lovely. My new boss is a nice bearded man who told me that I would have to watch River City and that it can take up to 12 hours by several people to subtitle just 1 hour of TV. I was agog. I think he may have been slightly disturbed how fascinating I found the whole thing, but hopefully not too disturbed that they change their mind. 2.5 weeks to go!
In other, brighter news, I just got an order on the MF website from Joey Ramone. He’s not dead after all, but living in Sheffield. Who knew?