There are various types of ocelots

Jings, crivvens and indeed help ma boab!

What a weekend of monumental, frustrating boredom it has been! I had great plans for Saturday. Lee is working all weekend so I had great plans for a day to myself, pottering around, cleaning the flat, taking a jaunt into town to look at trousers and maybe even go have a wee sit down in a cafe or something and read a book.

Sadly, that was scuppered by the fact that the demon bunny slippers were still not finished. Due to some crossed wires over first sizes of slippers needed to fulfil the order and then over the number of stitches in the constituent parts of said slippers, I was still knitting them on Friday evening. And as I didn’t finish on Friday evening, this activity carried on to Saturday.

Not to worry, I thought to mineself at 11.30, as I stumbled from my slumber into the shower. It’ll take 2 hours max and I can still be in town for around 3-ish. After nibbling on a bagel, I settled down for a couple of hours hardcore knitting in front of a bumper run of The Brittas Empire on Bravo.

Fast forwards in a Scooby Doo stylee to 12 hours later – and I am still on the sofa, still knitting ears and, frankly, wanting to stick the knitting needles (or instruments of torture as I now know them) into my eyes, ears and any other handy orifices, mine or anyone else’s. I had an hour off for dinner (good behaviour?) but it was almost midnight before they were done. I would like to go to sleep for a very long time.

Of course, you’d think that knitting the same thing for what felt like 4 weeks solid would have a soporific effect on the old noggin – but no, I was wide awak and so had to read an exciting book about Bangkok for a few hours before I could nod off.

Despite my late night, I decided to get up at 830 this morning to make the most of the day I missed out on yesterday. I had a good old sesh on Animal Crossing and paid off my mortgage so expecting another room tomorrow – very exciting. It was tipping it down in AC – and in real life, but I still headed off into town in the rain to get some bhat and to continue with yesterday’s aborted trouser-viewing mission.

After collecting the bhat, I looked at many trousers, but sadly none of them liked the look of me. As I stalked down Buchanan Street, the rain bouncing off the pavement, I thought St Enoch might be a good bet.

As I waited to cross Argyle Street, it suddenly struck me why no one was standing on the edge of the pavement – just as the number 204 bus engulfed me in a tidal wave of epic proportions. I was literally soaked from toe to crotch, and let me tell you, it was not fun at all. It would have been bad enough in just ordinary trousers, but in jeans – well, it was like dragging around 2 obese badgers clinging to my ankles.

I still lurched onwards to St Enoch’s, but by this time the staring and pointing at my unfortunate appearance proved too much and I gave up and came home instead, whereupon I came in and blew a fuse switching on the lights. It is REALLY not my day today. I did manage to see the trousers and a few other things online which they did have in the right size, so I have placed mine order – here’s hoping that they will be ok and the day will not have been entirely wasted.

I am off now to tidy up a bit, deliver the demon bunnies to Jo for facial construction surgery and then come home and lie on the floor for the rest of the day so no other ill can befall me.

p.s does anyone else’s satellite TV go funny in the rain?

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